In the last week since writing part 1, I’ve observed how, when, and where my devotion lies. I’ve found that it’s multi faceted . It’s as simple and concrete as being devoted to growing my hair out, or being devoted to my students, or as abstract as being devoted to a higher power.
In either case, I’ve found that when you are truly devoted to something, someone, some purpose, or some <fill in the blank> it shows up in all that you do. Devotion becomes a compass, a benchmark, a guide that directs your actions and answers your questions. When your devotion is truly genuine, you start doubting your doubts and confusion is replaced with answers, fear is replaced with curiosity, the people and situations that no longer fit go away. It’s a natural phenomenon.
But the tough question is, what are you being devoted to? Some devotions we are committed to is very obvious. For example, truth, freedom, family, even our work. Once you find it, you might find that your whole world, your life revolves around this. Sometimes the not so obvious devotions can also steer us in a direction. For example, addictions, drugs, alcohol, poor habits, bad relationships, fulfilling the ego, and I’m sure there are more hidden things that are not so glorious that could also be called devotions because they are the things that direct our life.
It takes courage to peep into your own life and see where your devotion lies. It takes even more courage to look with a non-judgemental eye in order to really see how you are living each moment. But mainly it takes even more courage to surrender and give up what you think you know, what you think you need, and who you think you are… because you might just be one of those things, people, or circumstance that no longer fits.
This work is not for sissies. Sometimes it’s scary. Sometimes it’s dark. Sometimes it’s blank. But I’ve found that as I continue to do this work, ask the questions, look, see, experience, and surrender, my questions get answered, doors open, signs appear and they reappear… everywhere!
We are guided. Have always been. Will always be.